Making your funeral wishes known
A ‘funeral wish’ is a person’s expression of their preferences for their funeral.
Talking about your death with the people you love is hard, but even a simple conversation about your wishes can make all the difference for them when the time comes.
Most of us find it hard to think about what will happen when we die, but we know from conversations with many families that even the simplest conversation about your funeral wishes can make a hard time a little bit easier.
You may want to make decisions about what happens after you die, including planning your own funeral. Not everyone wants to do this. But having conversations and planning ahead can help people close to you celebrate your life in a meaningful way.
Getting started
You can plan ahead for your funeral by thinking about what you’d like and sharing your plans. We can give advice to help you plan, organise and pay for your funeral in advance. Planning your own funeral ahead of time can help lighten the load for your loved ones. We’ll talk you through each decision, and take care of every detail.
A ‘funeral wish’ is a person’s expression of their preferences for their funeral.
Talking about your death with the people you love is hard, but even a simple conversation about your wishes can make all the difference for them when the time comes.
Most of us find it hard to think about what will happen when we die, but we know from conversations with many families that even the simplest conversation about your funeral wishes can make a hard time a little bit easier.
Funeral wishes can include:
Whether you prefer to be buried, cremated or buried at sea.
Coffin
The type of coffin you would prefer, such as wood, cardboard, or an eco-friendly material
Transportation
Whether you prefer to be transported to the burial site in a hearse or or vehicle of your choice.
Service
Whether you prefer a modest and respectful service, a grand send-off, or a celebration of your life
Theme
If you would prefer a theme based on a favorite film, musical, book, hobby, or decade
Poems
Specific poems you would like to be read
Contributions
Whether you would like to allow close relatives and friends to make their own contributions
Flowers: Whether you would like flowers at the funeral
Organiser
Who you would like to organise the funeral
Eulogy – delivered by family members or friends
Who you would like to give the main commemoration about your life
A recent survey has found that less than half of people have openly discussed their funeral wishes.
Less than half of people have openly discussed their funeral wishes.
More than 7 in 10 people have not made a will, research for by YouGov has found.
Less than half (45%) of people have openly talked about their funeral wishes with loved ones, a survey has found.
More than 7 in 10 (72%) people in the research said they have not made a will, with half (51%) saying this is because they have not got round to it yet.
The study was based on the views of more than 34,000 adults across the UK in autumn 2023.
The research found just one third of people (33%) are comfortable with and have talked to loved ones about their own death.
It is important to recognize that having these discussions now can provide peace of mind for loved ones in the future. Establishing funeral plans, securing life insurance, creating a will, or appointing a lasting power of attorney can greatly benefit those left behind when the time comes.
We strongly encourage individuals to engage in open and transparent dialogues with their loved ones regarding their wishes. By doing so, you can ensure that your desires are known and respected, ultimately easing the burden on your family during difficult times.
Lucy Harmer, CEO of charity Cruse Bereavement Support, said: “At Cruse Bereavement Support, we know that talking about death can ease anxiety, improve relationships, and help with grief. That’s why we support the funeral directors encouraging people to plan ahead and share their funeral wishes with their families.”
A simple solution
To help you we have created a four page document that asks you questions about what you would like to happen when you die.
We’ve made it as simple as possible to complete, and it asks questions such as whether you’d like cremation or burial, whether you have a plan in place already and what music or type of service you’d like.
You may only care about the songs that are played, or whether you’re buried or cremated; in which case you can write “No Preference” in the other sections.
At the end you can sign it and then simply give copies to the people who need to know, or leave it in a safe place for people to find when the time comes. The best option, if you can, is to discuss it with the people who matter so they know what you want.
Here is the link to our “My Funeral Wishes” document.
Either download and print the document, or download and open on your computer in Adobe Acrobat, this way you can then fill in the questions fields and save it digitally.
